Question by : Something big about everything?
Well, to start all this, without a doubt, i bet you guys are going to either ignore, hate or just think i’m a psycho or some idiot troll. But just at least read it.
I’m currently 18 and going to a highschool. It can’t be worse, it’s totally a disaster.
Nowadays, communication seems like a rubbish, it doesn’t even work. My friend and i are talking but no one knows what we’re talking about. There’s no end to it. I had many friends but as day pass, they seem to decrease. I have no good friend. I once doubted that i might be the bad friend to others but it was wrong. I always feel this insecurity when i’m around someone. I let them use me in any way, money, loss mentally, distraction, insult anything. Because i’m not so good at refusing people’s offer. I want to make them feel good and the gold rule as i was taught: “Treat others as how i want to be treated”. Any i treat others well and swell as possible. But then, the next day, they just put out their stress to me. It’s like i’m fine about i accept their offer, or should i say ‘used’ (because whatever they offer, it’s either going for dinner FOR them, a game room FOR them, lend for them, do something for them like a research.). I accepted which it was my choice so i’m fine with that, but after they put out their stress once, they insult about me to their friends and no other friend would like me by a rumor. I don’t know whether you readers think already that i’m a f@g or anything and i don’t want to know. Because i don’t care anymore. Whether people call me a f@ggot or a b1tch or anything insulting. Why should i feel bad about myself if they aren’t even a good friend to keep?
I had one friend, he was quite sensitive guy. I thought he was a good friend, caring one but he believe in words than me. I let him talk to me about his painful past and everything and because of a rumor that i hated his guts, he said “I’m so f**king pissed at you. Let’s not be friends” and then friendship ends. What an easy way to dump someone as a friend isn’t it? You just need to hear one word and you get to insult, abandon me from getting new friends, etc.
Let’s just say I AM THE BAD FRIEND. Then it would be the opposite way, not like i’m abandoned. I swear i never touch anyone’s nerves or anything. Nobody is for me, even my parents.
Everything seems to fall apart but i know i have hope. Not the hope of getting my lost friend back, which it seems pointless but my education. I’m living in Korea and whatever you do, it’s competitive. I’m not sure if i can handle that either but i am willing to. Among all those community and relationship problems i’ve gone through, i’d rather be alone every single day if i had access to music and what i’m interested. Sometimes i feel other people are in same situation as me all over the World.
I blame the media, technology and society. Media is all about celebrities and if i go to facebook to find help or talk about issues like above, everybody is saying like “Justin Bieber is the best!” or “F**k off Rebecca” ,etc. EVERYTHING IS ABOUT CELEBRITY OR SOMEONE THEY LIKE.
I don’t even know i should deal with those things. If i say something, it’s either how dare you write blah blah and ignorance.
Life is such an irony isn’t it. To have a wife, you need a job, house, car, looks, everything what they want, not you. The quote “The Truth shall remain quiet and persistently in action to be revealed” seems to be absurd these days.
Now i don’t even think none of you will answer this so i’ll just end it shortly.
When i was young, the school teacher won’t let us talk even at break time. So i just said “Spit at people” but the teacher misheard as “Spit at teacher” so i was left at school until evening when it suppose to be at 2.
Next is, i fought with lots of guys just because of rumors, just because they got in nerves that day and they expressed to me and putting as my fault, just because i was not COOL enough, etc.
I realize there were lot of bu1lshit around this World and i just feel so unfair those had to be in part of my life.
I became pessimistic and people are asking me to be optimistic. Whatever i post in facebook, my friends are like “Can’t you write something more bright?”. I just can’t understand them and probably they can’t either. Whatever happens, i feel it’s all misery business.
That’s why i feel depressed. I don’t know where to express myself, or let other know who i am. Because they’ll scream like “OMG U so uncool!!” whatever it is.
“A friend in needs a friend indeed,
A friend with weed is better,
A friend with breasts and all the rest,
A friend who’s dressed in leather”
This is part of a lyrics by Placebo – Pure Morning.
It seems l
Best answer:
Answer by estefano
emm, as a Korean guy let me give you a tip. Korean people could look friendly in the outside, but IF you are really interesting in making a closer bond as a friend it’ll be hard. I guess you can compare koreans with germans in terms of being kind at first sight but harsh to get really close with someone. Usually making a friend takes time, u can’t speed up a relationship… It’ll become too superficial. I live in south america, and i was in a time the only asian in my class (long time ago), I’ve noticed when someone’s different people tends to look friendly only in the outside nor simply reject you, but you’ve gotta give it some time and start becoming one more from the bunch. Also, have in mind that american’s are easier to aproach since it’s a country of immigrants, it’ll take more time to adapt yourself in a country like korea (not only there, but also in Europe, Africa…)
Be patient and think positive ^-^
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